Trouble

I don't know where else to go.

I am doing my on business now and I am thinking to expand it. The thing is I need some capital. So I was thinking maybe I could get some from dad and I told mom about it.

The thing is, she looked reluctant and she didn't even look at me. And then I get him.

He still owe her some money and we are still living in her house, almost for free. And I feel so humiliated.

I feel so bad. I am start to think this was a mistake.
Perhaps I should not be where I am now.

I know I am a bad person but I do hope God save His mercy for me. Pleaselah.

See the world

I want to go and see the world and I don't want to do it when I am already old, hardly walking. I want to see cultures and fashion and oh, the food too.

The question is when? How?

When are all my dreams will come true?

Sad. Sad.

Ok, I'll be patient but I don't know till how long can I stay and I am counting the time. Within 3 years from now, things MUST get better. MUST because I want to raise a child and I don't want to deal and live with all this shittiness anymore.

So what is they don't?

Just say, I have my plan already and a track record.

I don't like

I hate getting phone calls or sms from banks or credit cards company telling me that this is due and that is due when it's not even mine. It is distracting and making me feel bad. And annoyed. I don't want to know that certain certain person fail to pay their debts or whatsoever.

Can they stop calling me already?

Or should I change my number?