Menses

I realise something. I bloat during my pre menstrual cycle, and it was something which is can be seen with the eyes. Initially, I thought I was gaining some weight that my hips are no more that narrow but then, it all change after my menses comes.

Not just that, I thought SKII failed me by giving me lotsofbig juicy pimples, that I can't help squeezing. Now there are ugly marks on my face. Actually it was my hormones.

I am on constraceptive jabs. Had to take it every 3 months and supposedly, according to other people experiences, I will not have my menses at all. I did somehow but the side effect on my side was, I am having pregnancy symtomps. Tender breat, nausea, mood swing, urge to pee rapidly and craving.

At fisr, I thought I was pregnant but then when I did the pregnancy test, I was not.

Weird.

Oh anyway, I am drooling for this pair of nine west gladiator sandals! I am thinking should I or should I not get them. The thing is my budget is a bit tight but if I don't get them, I won't be able to sleep peacefully at night.


or


Hmm.

Loving someone

It is funny when you list down the criteria for your dream guy and ended settling with not what you wanted.

You thought that you could not settle for less and you are sure of that but when he came, you start to reanalyse. Sure he doesn't fit the criteria but he's a nice man. How easy it is to find a nice man nowadays?

Sometimes it is a wise decision to go for someone who really adores you rather than you crazily in love with them. Well, I am not saying that you shouldn't have any feeling for them, you should at least some.

Because if everything fail, you would not get hurt that much and when it's time to walk away, you can walk without turning back.

I am no ice queen, I only speak the truth although I know lots of people objected. I am sick of being a sick stupid puppy and at the end of the day just ignored, taken for granted and left behind.

But there's one thing that I can not deny. Despite the fact that I am not entirely happy and I have to bear for a little while (the duration is actually unknown and uncertain), I love him.

I do.

In need

I am in need of a job. Simply because I need to fulfill my desire for shopping.

I am sick and tired of waiting for other people to provide me with things which is also not unfair because my taste are no mediocre. I appreciate and love fine things in life and those things does not come free nor cheap.

I want a skinny jeans
I want a pair or leather flat ballerina, not from vincci
I want tonnes of clothing.
I want new handbag, and with distinguish name.

The problem is, no one wants to hire me and that's is bruising my ego and not to mention my self esteem.

Well actually they are already shattered.

I hate to say this but sometimes I wish I did not make certain decisions that I made.
I wish I can say I hate you out loud.

Stress buster

I am swarmed with lots of thing making it not possible to update. You can say that I am all stress up.

Speaking of which, what are your stress comforter? Husbands or significant others cannot be included!

Here are mine..

1. Soaking in tub with scented candle
   
   
   
   But I prefer with the light on so I can read, not to say books but more to fashion magazines!



2. Watch some chic flicks
   
   
   
   Really helped me to clear up my mind. And I will be happy at the end.
   



3. Go for window shopping
   
   
   
   It is ok if I don't buy anything, just browsing through already give me the exhilaration but if I buy something, even a tiny card, that would be enough to lift my spirit again.



4. Pig on chocolates
   
   
   
   I love godiva, baci, patchi and rocky road(cadbury australia). It may sounds cliche but chocolate works as a stress buster for me.

Those are some that I can think about at this moment. What about yours?

Wish list

I figure out I need a wish list. In case someone who knows me read this, that person could be so generous to get my at least one of them. Ha Ha!

Feeling scared now?

Because I mean it.

1. Fendi. B. Fendi watch
   
   
   
   
   Price: Approx USD550 or RM1925
   
   Why do I want it: I love the design and I need a watch



2. Nokia N96
   
   
   
   Price: Approx USD800 or RM2800
   
   Why do I want it: Love the look, sleek and sexy. Oh yes, I need a new phone too
   



3. Tiffany & co charm icons lock charm bracelet (for clearer picture please view the widget)
   
   
   
   
   Price: Approx USD600 or RM2100
   
   Why do I want it: I love Tiffany & co and would really want a charm bracelet
   



4. Gucci Indy Medium Top Handle
   
   
   
   Price: Approx USD2980 or RM10430 (please don't faint yet)
   
   Why do I want it: Need I say more? Breathtaking!
   

View my wish list on Wishpot »

Ok. That's all, for now. He He!

I shall wait if the fairygodmother would bring me any of those items. Although the chances are quite slim but there's no harm hoping :P

You know, I am never really get to use to being married. The status I mean. I know lots of people would be more than happy to acknowledge that they are happily married, especially if they are girls. There is nothing wrong with that it just that I can't just bring myself to admit that I am married.

Like, I still get invitations from guys for dates, movies and whatnot. And sometimes it make me want to scream when they hints for my status, because I just can't admit the truth nor lie.

"Who are going to the movie with this weekend? Your boyfriend maybe?"

That was a message from a guy in facebook.

Don't get me wrong ya, I am quite content with my current situation or my feelings towards phabmister is just that... I don't know. Maybe because by telling people I am married, they would lost interest in me? Sound stupid but maybe I am.

Or maybe I just want to keep my privacy to myself. Virtual people need not to know what's really going on in my life, exception for this blog of course since I think no one is reading.

I am not to sure but one thing that I am sure about, I have to create a diversion so that I would not

a) Lie
b) Tell the truth

How odd does that sound?

Kill me faster

I haven't been smoking for months since my birthday. I am not proud to say that I used to smoke but the feeling I get after few puffs are.. just indescribable. The remedy for my bogged mind and lost spirit. But, after my skin condition worsen, I decided to put a halt. I really need a good complexion. Mine is screaming like a lunatic. Aaaaaaaarghh with the capital A.

Yet tonight, I did it again. While putting on my home-made cucumber eye patch, I have the sudden urge. Actually there were few factors that triggered it. Stress and weird feeling. Nah, let's not go there.

Truly that was not something good. I don't judge people who smoke coz I used to smoke but this is in my personal contact. i need to stay away from doing it because.. err..err.. because I want to live a healthy lifestyle? Or something like that. You knoww.. sheesh I think you know what I mean.



Sigh.

See my point?

But how can one ignore when one is in need?

Exactly.

Fret not, I am going to fight it. Ok, I mean I will try my best to fight it. Hehe